Recipes from my Erotic Garden

It’s Tasty Tuesday. The day when a few of my author friends and I share easy-to-make, sexy recipes.

My contribution this week is inspired by the vegetables in our garden. This year our garden has turned into an erotic topic of conversation between me and my husband.

It all started when my husband pointed out how long our cucumbers were getting, and for some reason (which only a therapist could answer) I couldn’t stop the innuendos about cucumber size, plum tomatoes and the shape of our zucchini’s.

Give me time, I’m sure our rosemary bush, basil plants and green beans will be entering into the erotic vegetable hall of fame.

This past weekend we shopped at the local farmer’s market. I picked up a big cucumber and yelled over to my hubby, “Honey, this isn’t nearly as big as yours.” (Of course, I emphasized the word yours).

He shook his head when a few people laughed and he said, “This is my cross to bear, but I love her.”

I can’t stop with the cucumber innuendos. I need therapy.

Speaking of therapy; for me writing and cooking give me all the mental-help I need (I know some would argue this point, but some people don’t have characters occupying a ton of space in their heads).

In honor of the now infamous cucumber which has kicked out a few characters out of my head and taken up occupancy lately, I am sharing a few recipes for you to try.

I’m also adding a link from this blog for a great way to use avocado’s to make homemade anti-wrinkle cream. I must warn you, do not under any circumstances plaster your face with this avocado mush when you have visitors staying overnight at your home.

Click on this link and you’ll see why I give you this warning.

Now that I think about it, green vegetation tends to get me in a lot of trouble, whether they’re cucumbers or avocados.

Cucumber, Tomato, Pepper, Mango Salsa


3 ripe mango, peeled and diced

1 large English cucumber, diced in small pieces

4 fresh plum tomatoes, chopped in small pieces

3 Tbsp fresh parsley leaves, chopped – (I don’t have a good relationship with cilantro, so I use parsley, however if you’re on speaking terms with cilantro you can substitute it for the parsley)

The juice of 1 fresh lime

1 red bell pepper, chopped in small pieces

1 yellow bell pepper, chopped in small pieces

2 jalapeno peppers, seeded and finely chopped – (leave the seeds in if you like the salsa spicy)

1 clove garlic, minced

Kosher salt and black cracked pepper to taste

Mix everything together and you have a delicious, no-fat, low-carb, healthy snack.

To keep your thighs and hips happy, serve with gluten-free, low-salt nacho chips or cut up cucumber slices (can’t get those things off my mind) and use the cucumber slices as crackers.

Cucumber/Lemon Water

This is a tasty way to spike your water. It’s also a great way to detoxify your skin. (Actually, I have no idea if that’s true, but it does sound like it could). Water, lemons, cucumbers—-all healthy.

Serve it in a cocktail glass, put your feet up, slice up some cucumbers place them on your closed eyelids, lay back and relax.

Sipping this water with a little background music, will make you feel like you’re at the spa.

So, do you think I have an obsession with cucumbers?

Please stop by and visit my fellow authors who are also sharing recipes on this Tasty Tuesday:

The Automatic Reboot by PG Forte

“The Quickie” by A. Catherine Noon

Also, please feel free to add your thoughts and share your recipes in the comments section, especially if they include a 12 incher (cucumber that is) 😉

11 responses to “Recipes from my Erotic Garden”

  1. Mmm. love cucumber water. And anything that combines mangoes and cilantro is gooood.


    1. I drink cucumber water a lot, PG. Love mangoes, nix the cilantro for me though.


  2. Oh Selena! Cilantro is the best ingredient ever!! But I will respect your hatred of it. Your conversation with your hubby cracks me up! Thanks for the recipes.


    1. Thanks for dropping by, Rosanna. My husband has come to accept that some of our conversations will make their way on my blog. LOL


  3. A. Catherine Noon Avatar
    A. Catherine Noon

    MMMMMMMmmmmangggooooooo! I like cilantro. But that’s me. 😛 And I love cucumber water, I never thought about putting lemon in with it! 🙂


    1. Lemon and limes are good with it too, Catherine. Thanks for stopping by.


  4. Love salsa almost as much as kilted men and Guinness-I know so totally opposite sides of the world right? Going to have to put this at the top of my list the next time I’ve got a craving for some salsa!

    Sorry I missed out on playing this week.


    1. Hi, Moira, you can have the salsa, sip some Guiness and watch kilted men all at the same time. This type of multi-tasking is great.

      We’ll look forward to your recipes on a Tuesday when you have time, no problem.


  5. […] Recipes from my Erotic Garden by Selena Robins […]


  6. Thanks for the tip on the cucumber water. I put my cucumber in the water and let it soak. Isn’t quit 12 inches but big enough.


    1. Glad you enjoyed the blog post.


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