Have you met-a-phor that doesn’t make sense?


Metaphors—we all use them in speech in and in writing so I thought I’d have some fun with some common metaphors that if you really think about it, don’t make a heck of a lot of sense.

Walking on eggshells, which is a metaphor for talking to someone who has a bad temper in which the slightest sound or disturbance may send them off into the Kingdom of Royal Pissdom.

Take a bunch of egg shells and spread them all over the floor, then try walking on them. You can’t. Whatever you do, you’re going to make noise, crack the shells, make a mess and your efforts to not disturb the raging maniac you’re in the room with becomes obselete. Not to mention, if said pissed off person hates a mess around them or the crackling noise, they may go all Terminator on you (ah, just used a metaphor for an angry person, but this I can visualize…an unreasonable anger-management candidate getting all Terminator like).

The elephant in the room is a metaphor for people to ignore a serious issue that exists but they don’t want to talk about said serious issue.

I don’t know about you, but if there were an elephant in the room, I’d get the hell out of there. Seriously, how can one ignore it? Unless you’re real handy with a gargantuan pooper scooper, and even then, I wouldn’t want to be standing behind an elephant.

Rolling in dough references someone who has a lot of money.

First of all, if someone is a bazillionaire, they’d probably have a full staff to roll around in dough, mud or a vat of Jello. Secondly, making dough is simple and cheap to do…flour, water, eggs and yeast.

Eats like a bird is used to describe someone who doesn’t eat much.

Birds need a ton of energy to fly and look for food, prey on smaller birds and they take up residence at bird feeders without paying rent. They eat a LOT and often. Besides, I don’t know many people who perform face plants in their dinner plates.

Clean as a whistleAs long as nobody has already blown into a whistle, because if they did, I certainly wouldn’t want to be metaphored  as my house having saliva all over it.

Have you ever met-a-phor that gives you a visual and makes you think…”Huh?”

6 responses to “Have you met-a-phor that doesn’t make sense?”

  1. Lol love it Selena, mine would be ( When Pigs fly)
    My understanding is you will only do something if pigs fly. I myself would love to see a pig fly I have a few houses and cars I would love them to fly over. Lol


    1. Thanks, Kelly. I wouldn’t mind a pig flying, as long as it was way way way after it ate, I mean, bird poop on my car is bad enough…Miss Piggy’s would be a real yucky problem. 🙂


  2. It’s raining cats and dogs. What does that even mean? If it is ever raining cats and dogs I’m staying in the house. I will not get hit in the head by a squealing Siamese or a barking Chihuahua.


    1. LOL Heidi.

      It’s true, what the hell do cats and dogs have to do with raining?

      Maybe it has something to do with Toto and the hurricane and he piddled on the way down after being swept up in the hurricane?

      Obviously, I have no idea what I’m talking about.

      Love your visual of the Siamese and Chihuahua. LOL


  3. Y’all need to see some of the ones I grew up hearing. They make no sense at all. I think my grandparents tried to give us explanations, but they just served to further confuse me.
    — Happy as a dead pig in sunshine
    — Ugliest thing God ever stretched skin over
    –Leaning over toward Aunt Nancy
    — My sister’s room was often described as “The Wreck of the Hesperus”
    — If a frog had wings…..
    –Useless as tits on a boar hog

    The list goes on and on and on….


    1. LMAO! Thanks for sharing, LB, love those. Have no clue what they mean, but then again, I am only starting to learn how to speak “Southern.”

      – dead pig in sunshine. LOL LOL

      They are all so funny, I am going to have to integrate them in my everyday language.


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