I bet you think you know what the F***** is all about, don’t you?
I bet your mind headed south (a place mine goes most days) thinking that’s what the secret to a great relationship is—lots and lots of f*****g.
Well, you’ll just have to read on to find out what this f*****g is all about
Please note: The following secrets which I believe lead to a happy relationship are my opinion only, and are not based on any scientific research, because I’m not scientifically inclined.
My Top 25
(In no particular order)
1. Flirt with each other and never stop dating. Replicate the things that got you together in the first place. For example: sitting on the couch and neck up a storm, holding hands at the movies…you know like you did when you first started dating.
2. A bad memory.
3. Fight fair. Duke it out in a reasonable way, and if you can add some humor during the sparring, all the better. Bursting out laughing during a disagreement leads to joint laughter which leads to some good old fashioned make-up lovin’. Mainly, let each other know what you’re pissed off about, get over it, and move on.
4. It is said that couples should not go to bed mad at each other. I say, go ahead and go to bed mad. However, you both have to get naked, sit on the bed, facing each other and hold hands. Nobody is going to go to sleep mad. Guaranteed.
5. Those important three little words: “Let’s go out.“
6. Like each other. Yes, love is important, but so is liking the person you spend most of your time with. This is the thing that got you together in the first place. When you were friends, and enjoyed being together. It will be the strong friendship that will get you through the times when you annoy the begeebers out of each other.
7. Separate closets.
8. Separate bathrooms.
9. Pick your battles. Guys: put the seat down. Gals: If he puts toilet paper roll over the top, or under—it doesn’t matter. The fact that he replaces it is cause for celebration.
10. And now for the “F” word. FUNNING of course. Have fun and lots of it. Tons of ways to bring back the euphoria of all that fun you had when you were dating—splashing each other in puddles, walking in the rain, texting each other naughty messages (just don’t punch in the wrong number, it’s one of those awkward moments, not that happened to me or anything 🙂 ), crank up the music and dance around the house together, have a pillow fight. Whatever you choose to do, have fun doing it.
11. Read a romance book together.
12. Cook together.
13. Patience. Not only with each other, but with yourself.
14. If one of you is a morning person and the other isn’t, then do not have breakfast together.
15. Togetherness is great, I’m a huge advocate, but I also think it’s conducive to one’s sanity to have separate interests, and passions that are just yours. You can then bring something new to the discussion to chat about.
16. Be polite to each other. Thank you. You’re welcome. Please. All those words our mamma’s taught us when we learned how to talk.
17. Always have a supply of sticky notes on hand, and leave each other some notes—in the car, briefcase, pillow, laptop case….use your imagination. Leave, thinking of you notes. Just wanted to say hi. Be naughty. Be nice. Be funny. Anything goes.
18. Sometimes silence really is golden. You don’t have to express every thought to each other.
19. Be each other’s star in your fantasies.
20. Hire someone to paint the house. Unless one of you really enjoys doing it, and wants to do it.
21. Don’t put pressure on each other for a perfect birthday gift, Christmas gift, Valentine’s gift….give each other something special when you want to do it, and not because you feel you have to do it.
22. Talk about what you admire about each other. This is especially helpful if one of you is ticked off at the other. Mentally checking off the things you really like and love. Repeating that helps eliminate the ticked-offness.
23. Compliment each other. You do it for others, then do it for each other, because you need to treat each other even more kindly than you treat others.
24. Take care of YOU first. Think about it. When on an airplane, you’re advised to put on your oxygen mask first in case of emergency, so you are able to take care of your loved ones. Same with life. Take care of YOU first. It will make it a lot easier to take care of the ones you love.
25. Engage in fun, nonsensical pillow talk.
Embrace all the choices life has to offer. Love is a choice. Happiness for yourself and for each other is a choice. Maintaining a sense of humor is a choice. Choosing to overlook the imperfections, and knowing that your choice to be the best you can be for yourself, will automatically spill into your relationship, and will help make life a whole lot easier.
There’s no such thing as a perfect person, or relationship, so scrap that whole notion, because it doesn’t exist.
Love. Live. Laugh.
Every love story is beautiful. Make yours, your absolute favorite.